Mother's Day In A Whole New Light

Even though I have been a mommy for a little over 5 years now, this Mother's Day felt completely different.  Ever since I had baby E, I feel that I appreciate my other two children more.  I always felt blessed to have them but never realized how lucky I truly was.  I am not sure if this happened because E was in the NICU or if it was because she spent a week in the hospital at just 2 months old.  I remember looking at my little baby and feeling completely helpless.

She was struggling to breathe and there was nothing I could do to take that pain away from her.  To be honest, I am not even sure how I had the physical energy to stand and rock her.  But I did, it seemed to be the only thing to soothe her.  I went almost 5 days with barely any sleep just trying to comfort my baby or making sure she wasn't getting any worse.  I remember that Sunday morning ( our third morning in the hospital) being woken up to a nurse yanking my baby out of my arms and calling for the doctor.  My heart broke as they quickly put a feeding tube down her nose and called for respiratory.  At this point, my little lady had barely nursed in a couple days.  Every time she tried, she would gag and throw up.  The new treatments brought relief to my girly and while my husband kept an eye on her, I was able to catch a little rest.  I heard the doctor come in and speak to my husband even though I was half out of it.  She told him how lucky we were and how they were talking about transporting her to another hospital.  In that moment, I realized how lucky I was and from then on, I treasure my baby. 

 

I don't care if she sleeps in my bed, I don't care if she wants to nurse every 2 hours.  I don't care if she doesn't sleep through the night.  I don't care if she wants me to walk around the house for hours at a time or be extra clingy.  Because before I know it she will be Ella and Kollin's age and these moments will be gone.  Before I know it, my arms will ache to hold her and she will want to be off doing her own thing. I wish I would of been in no rush for the other two to grow up.  I wish I would of let them cuddle as long as they wished when they were this tiny.  I will never take them for granted again that is for sure.  It also made me appreciate my own mother more.  It is true you do not understand your parents love until you are a parent yourself.

 

 

All in all, we had an awesome Mother's Day and I enjoyed every second with my three little babies.  We also spent some quality time with our own mothers which is always nice! How was your Mother's Day?